A Year Ago....

It was just a year ago that my mom and I went back to Ghana to bring Fia and Kwame home. I can't believe that it has already been a year and then at other times it feel like they have always been here. I already blogged on this over at Shopmama.com 's website, so I thought I would connect you over to ADOPTIONmama if you were interested.

A Grade School Apology

Wow. I am truly blown away right now. I know that facebook is usually not about anything deep, but today I was so surprised to get an email from an acquaintance from grade school. What is even cooler, is that this wasn't the first one of this type. I received another one like this a few months back. What kind of email was it? An apology.

To give you all a little background about me you may or may not know, I lost my hair when I was in kindergarten and we were living in Seattle area. I didn't get it back fully until around the 4th grade. When I say 'lost my hair', I mean all of it. Everywhere( ie.- no hair on my arms, legs, eyebrows....)! It stemmed from an auto-immune disease that I got called Alopeica and it just means 'hair loss'. Most people who have Alopecia, don't ever get their hair back, so that was my reality. Honestly though, for me and my family, despite the diagnosis, we all hoped and prayed and believed it would be different.

Soon after I lost my hair, we moved back to the Chicago suburbs and we ended up living there for over 20 years. We moved into a community that we had already lived in a couple years back and our church family was definitely what I attribute, along with my family, my confidence, hope, self-worth and that God didn't 'mess up' with me(the story of how I have my hair now will be for another day).

You see, when you move into a new school during 1st grade with no hair, no eyebrows, and wearing a Snoopy baseball hat, you aren't the 'cool new girl!' I was always jealous of those ones in the years to come; they seemed to have it so easy! Ha! Anyway...I remember being teased, having kids either knock my hat off purposely, or stealing it until the recess aides would help. I did find friends in a couple girls, but usually in boys(they thought I was pretty good at kickball, chase, and riding our dirt bikes), so they would stick up for me when they were around. But of course, I got teased and so did they for playing together with the opposite gender. I laugh now, but I remember getting some Valentine's cards from my boy 'friends'in my mailbox that said, "I love you,"and it was obvious they weren't from them. Of course, the ones that wrote them were right there and laughing-gosh, kids sure get a kick out of being mean! Ugh...one of the worst cases though(because an adult did it) was a substitute teacher that would NOT let up about me taking my hat off since kids weren't allowed to wear hats in school. I remember some kids stuck up for me and others didn't and it eventually came down to the teacher sending me down to the Principal's office since I wouldn't take it off! Needless to say, the principal was definitely behind me, but it was humiliating to me as I was a straight and narrow kid(for the most part-at THAT age)!

This gets me back to the two facebook messages I have received from two classmates during those years. The first one said that he remembered first meeting me and drawing attention to the fact that I was wearing a hat and telling me that I couldn't wear it in school. I have no recollection of that incident, but he remembered it in detail, down to what hat I was wearing! He said he carried it with him throughout high school, and every time he passed me in the halls, he felt bad about not apologizing for drawing attention to me that day. Wow, I was so impressed with him! Isn't it crazy how long we carry things if we push them aside and not deal with them? I was so thankful that he did finally say something and was able to find out that I either don't remember it or it wasn't that big of a deal. I just thought it took a lot of guts!

Today, I got another email apologizing for being a bully to me and others in grade school (again, I remember incidents, but not the people involved, which I think is good!). He said he remembers teasing me and trying to embarrass me. He wanted to apologize after all these years, but didn't want to sound weird. Weird? I was so humbled! I wrote back that I honestly don't remember him as being mean to me, just a 'tough guy' on the outside, but could tell that he was a teddy bear on the inside(I actually didn't say teddy bear for fear of embarrassing him, but said I could tell he was different on the inside-ha!)

How cool is that though? I was so happy to get these emails. I do remember the hurt, but not the people, and it felt good to have the apologies. What was even better was find out that even those that are considered the 'bullies' chose a different path as an adult. These are also good lessons for my kids to learn and I am definitely going to share them. I am honestly thankful that I lost my hair when I was younger for a variety of reasons, but in regards to this discussion, it has given me a heart to seek out those who are outcast and also look deep into the hearts of the bullies. And the piece of asking for forgiveness...that is hard, but it is healing for both parties!

P.S. My scanner is on the fritz, but when it is up again, I will post a picture of my grade school years in case you are curious.

(bugle sounds)Bum-ba-da-BUM...ADOPTIONmama!

I got my first writing gig! Check out ADOPTIONmama @ http://www.shopmama.com/ ! It is the online site for Hot Mama, a fantastic women's clothing boutique that now has 14 stores, mostly in the Midwest(but I keep pushing for one to come out west). When they opened their first boutique about 5 years ago in Edina, MN, I loved it and so did my kids! My hope was to visit all of them when they opened(as my dear friend is the owner), but they have grown so quickly to 14 and I think I have only made it to six. Oh well... if you are ever in the area of one of these, I can guarantee, you will have a great shopping experience, with or without kids in tow. They have a computer station for the kids to work on, a train table to play with, and even some animal crackers to munch on, while you browse around. The clothing is stylish and sassy, with a price range for many, and they also carry trendy maternity clothes too.

So, I am excited. I have been going around my house declaring myself ADOPTIONmama in a regal sort of voice, also implying I may be some kind of superhero or something. Surprisingly, my kids are unfazed and have not started bowing down...YET!

In all honesty, I feel very blessed to get this opportunity to blog for this company for a few reasons: 1)the heart and vision behind the company has always been to help women feel better about themselves and be confident, 2) I can share our adoption story and possibly encourage others along the way or even educate on adoption issues, and 3)I get a discount now-yippee!!

A blog from Haiti I follow

I am not quite sure when I started reading this blog, but it was one that has touched me for the last couple years as we have been in the adoption process. They seem so real and I connected with them in an online blogging sort of way. Anyway, this familiy has been in Haiti for the last four years. Thankfully, they are all okay, but they have seen and lived through this last week of the unspeakable. Here is their website to see things through their eyes and pray along with them and others, as they are being the hands and feet....

Christmas Card 2009 & Happy New Year

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!! I just wanted to add this onto our blog for two reasons: 1), www.ChristinaKoonPhotography.com did an awesome job of capturing our family and designing the cards and 2), I didn't order enough!! Oops! I thought I bought plenty, but about two weeks ago, I realized I was going to be short, so I stopped addressing them and just waited to send them to people as we received theirs(probably not the most Christmas-y thing to do, huh?). The bad thing about that, is that we still had about twenty cards in our mailbox after we got home from Minnesota. Oh well, hopefully for those of you that did not receive one that usually does, you will read this and forgive me-sorry!! :)

Christmas @ the Farm-2009

The slideshow above is from our time at the farm. We had an absolutely fantastic time there! We got to see so many relatives and introduce Fia and Kwame to many of them. It was our first time traveling on a plane as a family of seven and I can honestly say, that besides fitting our bags in one car, it was a piece of cake! We have excellent travelers. Unfortunately, the parents behind us didn't have as good of luck during the bumpy flight with their little one-yuck!

We traveled on Christmas Day and I really wish I would have my camera or video camera ready for when we were about a mile from the farm. We hadn't seen any cars in over 90 miles because there was so much snow and all of a sudden, there are two deer that are coming on the road straight at our lights. We slow down and they realize they need to turn around, so they do, but they don't leave the road. They just run directly in front of us at high speed. Eventually we slow down because we didn't want to scare them, but they too, just slow down and stay on the road. At this point we told the kids that they must be Rudolph and Vixen leading us into the farm; after all, it was Christmas! We decided we needed video,so we stopped the car for me to look for the camera, and then they stopped and actually came up to the car-it was surreal! We eventually spooked them and they jumped into the drifts(up to their heads). Just at that moment, we got to Daron's lane to his farm and Daron's dad came down the hill in his John Deere tractor with plow!Grandpa was our hero-they kids were totally cheering(and screaming!). We never would have gotten up without him and the plow lane was EXACTLY the width of our tires! (read-good driving Daron). What a fun adventure on Christmas night as we arrived-we will never forget it!

The rest of our time was fun(and cold)as you can see from the pictures...some of you may have already heard me whine about no espresso stands within 60 miles from the farm, and that was terribly challenging for me(hee hee-maybe just a little exaggeration), but I have a great mother-in-law that bought some strong coffee and a brother-in-law that brought me some Starbucks Frappucino's-thanks guys!! Wow, am I high maintenance??!! Good thing for me they think I have cute kids that are worth it and balance me out!

2009 Christmas in WA

Happy 4th Birthday Kwame!!

Happy birthday to our sweetest little boy!! I am so thankful that we get to spend his birthday with him for the first time this year. We missed him SO much last year and this time last year, my heart was aching for him. Now, we get to celebrate with this little guy, who has stolen our hearts-we love you Kwame!

(Kwame asked for peanut butter and banana with some sugar cereal for his special breakfast in bed!)

Kwame has such an excitement for life; he lights up a room whenever he walks in. He is easy going, super loving towards his siblings, and just loves people! He is a daddy's boy and a mommy's boy all at once-we are blessed! On this Christmas Eve morning, we have so much to be thankful for. We LOVE you Kwame!!!

Kwame got a cool John Deere bike this year! We are thinking his Grandparents at the farm are going to love it too! They are mostly a 'green' farm. We actually got it for him at an auction earlier this fall for Water 1st and it has been so hard to hide it from him!

"Ho, ho, ho..Green Giant!"

Remember that jingle at the end of the Jolly Green Giant commercial? Did you know that there is actually a replica of him in MN in a little town near Daron's family farm? I think it is Blue Earth. I'm guessing that's where the company began. We used to stop by there when we would drive from Chicago to MN all the time(there was a Dairy Queen there). Anyway..I told the kids that they are growing like the Green Giant......

It was six months ago exactly that we last measured Fia and Kwame, so I decided, what the heck, I already have 100 things on my list to do today, why not add one more....(two, now that I am blogging) THEY HAVE GROWN TWO INCHES SINCE JUNE! I have been hang drying their pants lately since I thought they were shrinking, but in reality, these kids have been growing like weeds. Kwame(4 tomorrow) is also 3 lbs. heavier than Fia(5). He is pretty proud of that and keeps saying that Fia is little-er. Fia was very relieved that she was still an inch taller than Kwame. The other kids are also growing, but in comparison, they grew two inches in a year. Justus is almost 5 ft. and Ella is a inch taller than Justus was at this age...anyone following? Random post I know, all this to say we have been focusing on growth this morning.

**Also, as an addendum to the last post, my dad was over this morning for donut day and I asked Kwame to tell him what tomorrow is (thinking he'd say his birthday/Christmas Eve). Kwame looked at him and smiled-"ipod!"**